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Is poor business writing losing you potential customers? (Here’s how to win them back!)
Mary Bennett • 8 November 2019
An article in The Sunday Times back in the summer noted that TV’s Love Islanders like to say, er, like. Quite a lot, actually. In fact, this particular 4-letter word was used, like, 76 times in, like, under five minutes. And, in an effort to encourage children to broaden their vocabulary, a primary school in Bradford banned the word ‘like’ in class, putting it in a ‘word jail’.
It seems we’re all getting a bit lax when it comes to language, but it’s easy to pick up these habits when talking face-to-face. In most everyday conversations no one really notices too much, and it’s natural to slip into slang or jargon when you’re on familiar territory; nobody would ever refer to the BBC in its full form, for instance, because the abbreviation is well-established, and nor would you be likely to greet your mates in a formal manner.
However, when it comes to the written word, if we were all to write exactly how we speak things might get a little confusing. Variations in accents would cause a few spelling arguments for a start, but certain businesses might start losing their authenticity.
Would you trust a bank that intoned: ‘Need, like, more cash, kinda like now? You might wanna fink about getting a loan, so jus’ go online and fill in a form alright’? (Actually, that makes a lot more sense than some financial comms we’ve encountered! 😀)
We applaud the businesses who are cutting out the jargon and speaking to their customers in clear, concise language. But there’s a huge difference in adopting a common-touch approach in your written comms and writing sloppily. If your audience’s first impression of you is through poor written content, then it doesn’t matter how expert you are in your field, it will do nothing other than put potential customers off.
British writer Benjamin Zephaniah is a great example of someone who uses slang successfully to bring his Jamaican-influenced poetry to a mainstream audience. But as he himself has observed: "Whether we like it or not, the way we talk affects the way people see us and this can have very serious consequences.”
True enough. So next time you’re crafting a presentation or email marketing campaign, think carefully about who your audience is. There’s no point bombarding people with acronyms and business jargon if the people you’re addressing don’t have a clue what you’re on about. They’ll simply zone out.
So choose your words (and context) carefully!
If you’ve got an amazing new product or service that you want to shout about, then a press release is a great way of spreading the word. But before you start putting pen to paper, bear in mind that editors and journalists are regularly flooded with releases, many of which don’t even get read. As former journalists and editors, we’ve been on the receiving end of many excellent press releases that hit the spot and many more that only hit the rubbish bin. So how do you ensure that yours is a must-read that stands a chance of gaining you that all-important media coverage? You talking to me? Before you even start writing, ask yourself whose attention are you trying to get? Decide who your audience is and then spend time researching your target media. Start to build a relationship with relevant journalists and editors – don’t just follow them on social media, engage with them. Journalists like to get to know the people who are sending them stories. Check out their publishing schedules and timelines (every journalist works to a deadline) and investigate regular features and what sort of things regularly make the cut. What journalists hate When it comes to press releases, there’s nothing journalists dislike more than a sales pitch so don’t try and sell them your service or product. What journalists love is a good story. Make sure your press release paints a picture through storytelling and portray your story as a benefit to someone else. Less sell, more tell! They are much more likely to take a story and use it as content for an article or feature. The 5 ‘W’s Journalists love information. It’s free content! Whatever story you’re telling, it has to provide relevant answers to the 5 ‘W’s – who, what, when, where and why. These are the backbone of your release. A punchy headline that generates interest, good grammar and correct spelling will do you a lot of favours too. And remember to keep it real when you’re writing…journalists aren’t looking for a literary masterpiece. Next time you’re tackling a press release try the Grab – Hook – Inform – Reassure approach, it works! Step 1: GRAB An informative headline that packs a punch is key to grabbing the reader’s attention. Choose your words carefully and keep them succinct, informative and eye-catching. Humour works well but only where appropriate! Here are examples of two headlines, the first lacks impact while the second is engaging: New florist opens in high street From bust to bloom: how new florist is rejuvenating the high street Step 2: HOOK So you’ve grabbed the reader’s attention with a snappy headline; now you have to hook their interest with your opening sentence. This is basically a concise summary of the press release so the reader knows what to expect. Step 3: INFORM A good press release will get to the heart of the story straightaway. You’ve grabbed their attention and hooked their interest and now you need to provide the answers to the 5 ‘W’s in the main body of the release. Keep it as short as possible (journalists and editors are always time-poor) whilst still providing all the relevant information. One A4 page is ideal, anything longer than two pages and you’re wasting your time. Say why the story is currently relevant; your aim is to convince the editor to cover it now. Include a little background information on the subject/company in the main body. Quotes are a must! They add flavour and authenticity so include a couple of punchy quotes from someone involved in the story. Step 4: REASSURE Finally, how should you end a press release? The last paragraph of your release, or the boilerplate as it’s often referred to, needs to expand on the ‘who’ in your story. It’s your chance to tell the reader more about your business. Think of it a bit like the ‘About Us’ page on your website – it helps to give a fuller picture of who you are and shows your credibility and authority. Keep it engaging, informative and let your brand’s personality shine through. A concise line about your company’s goals and achievements will round your press release off nicely. Step 5: CONTACT Don’t forget to include contact information at the end of your release so that the journalist or editor can get in touch with any questions…let’s face it, they’re so hooked by your story, they’re sure to want to know more!
With the autumn academic term now in full swing, it’s time for ‘A’ level students setting their sights on a university place to nail writing their personal statement. A vital part of the application process, the personal statement is an opportunity for students to showcase their skills and say why they deserve a place on their chosen course. It’s important to remember that a personal statement should always be the applicant’s own work – the clue’s in the word ‘personal’! When we’re helping small businesses with their written content, our advice is to choose your words carefully and make sure they present you in the very best light. The same applies to students and their personal statements. When tackling this writing challenge, try to keep the following advice in mind: • Know what you want to say before you start writing. Use Mindmapping or an outlining app such as Word Outline to create a structure with subheadings and headings. You’ll be amazed how quickly those words flow once you have a plan. • Show that you have done your research; write about specific aspects of the course and say why these aspects interest you and why you would like to explore them further. • Write about relevant books you’ve read, films or documentaries you’ve watched or events you’ve attended that show a true interest in the subject matter. Again, demonstrate your understanding, don’t just list authors or use quotes. • Don’t be shy when you’re writing about your suitability for the course. It’s an opportunity to blow your own trumpet! Write about experiences you’ve had that are relevant to the course and showcase your skills. • Avoid a long list of academic abilities, courses or work experience. Pick the most relevant and demonstrate why they were valuable to you: have you done voluntary work? Excelled at a particular piece of coursework? Are you a good listener? A great analyser? Show why you’re so deserving of a place on the course. • Don’t try and impress by using long, complicated words or jargon. Keep your writing simple and concise. Hold the interest of the reader by varying the length of your sentences. • Draft, draft and redraft! Your first attempt doesn’t have to be perfect…it just has to be written. • Don’t be tempted to lie or plagiarise. Remember, it’s your voice they want to hear, not someone else’s. • Spellchecking tools are useful but won’t pick up the wrong spelling for the context. Always proofread your work and get someone else to read over it too. Good luck and get writing…as the American novelist Louis L’Amour once said: “Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on”!